Cancer, Community, and Buffalo Chicken

My latest on Blood-Cancer.com:

Cancer, Community, and Buffalo Chicken.

I've been thinking more and more lately about community, and the need to be with people who understand what I've been through.


There's something very satisfying about someone talking about an experience, and getting the feeling that you've been there yourself.

A few months ago, I went to the HealtheVoices conference in Chicago. I wrote about this -- how great it was to meet other online cancer advocates and feel that kind of connection.

I didn't write about a session on the closing day, when a breast cancer advocate talked about having to tell her kids that she had cancer. I relived everything. It was one of the hardest things I've ever done. When the session was over, I stopped her as she was leaving (three days and it was my first time getting a chance to speak to her -- she's very popular).

I introduced myself and said, "The stuff you said about telling your kids really hit a nerve."

"I'm so sorry!" she said.

"No no. Don't be sorry. It was a good thing. Really."

And it really was. As hard as it was to tell my kids, and as hard as it was to relive it right there, it was good to make that connection with someone else.

Is that weird?

Yes, a little, in a "misery loves company" kind of way.

But it also reminds me of how important it is to be a part of a community, especially one made up of other Follicular Lymphoma patients, or at least other cancer patients. People who know what you've been through.

And if that's not possible, then people who support you, even if they don't understand it completely.